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Thread: Whither Tim Tebow?

  1. #1
    Recovering Christian
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    Whither Tim Tebow?

    This provided a much-needed laugh this morning, although the rest of the people on the subway thought I was crazy:

    http://fifthdown.blogs.nytimes.com/2...ow-the-sequel/

    I particularly like the Falcons scenario.
    All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the state wherein they reside. No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any state deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

    (and thank you, Ted Kennedy)

  2. #2
    Alex, meet Bench.
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    Love the Tebow-to-Panthers scenario:
    CAROLINA PANTHERS Tebow and Cam Newton bring the single-wing offense back to pro football. Either player could pass or run at any time, creating confusion for defenses and delight for fans, until the N.F.L. conformity commissar orders the Panthers to return to some variation on the West Coast offense or else incur a salary-cap penalty.

  3. #3
    MuscleBear™ Rambulance's Avatar
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    I'm partial to the Ravens' scenario.

    BALTIMORE RAVENS General Manager Ozzie Newsome creates the perfect quarterback by grafting Joe Flacco’s cannon arm onto Tim Tebow’s powerful, agile body. The quarterback created from Tebow’s scattershot arm and Flacco’s gawky frame is traded to the Dolphins.
    "Loyalty to any one sports team is pretty hard to justify, because the players are always changing; the team could move to another city. You're actually rooting for the clothes when you get right down to it." -- Jerry Seinfeld

    Being a Rams fan is like having perpetual diarrhea.

  4. #4
    In Russ We Trust dcten's Avatar
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    Congrats to the Jets for making QB comedy not exclusive to Miami.
    I'm going to type every word I know! Rectangle. America. Megaphone. Monday. Butthole.

  5. #5
    Affectedly Disingenuous FamineGod's Avatar
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    Enjoy Tebow in NY, Jim.
    "Let's eat Grandma!"..."Let's eat, Grandma!"
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  6. #6
    My borogoves are mimsy Superbelt's Avatar
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    Ha ha.
    The consistent factor of all of your dissatisfying relationships and failures is you.

    R.W. 09.21.10 I love you.

  7. #7
    gangster PC Load Letter's Avatar
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    Over/Under on the week Jets fans start chanting for Tebow?

  8. #8
    My borogoves are mimsy Superbelt's Avatar
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    That hasn't started yet?
    The consistent factor of all of your dissatisfying relationships and failures is you.

    R.W. 09.21.10 I love you.

  9. #9
    Thanks, Darrell MKHawk's Avatar
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    Heh, suck it Sanchize
    "Personal foul, 69, offense. He was giving him the business."

  10. #10
    Skinny Punk Gmaniac's Avatar
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    Lightbulb

    Jets are a good niche for Tebow... what with Tony "Wildcat" Spadaro running the offense there.

    Hope Timmy is ready for the big city press, though. Things can turn negative in a hurry in N.Y.C.
    Although it is said that our faith concerns matters which are obscure, the reasons for embracing the faith are not obscure but on the contrary are clearer than any natural light.
    -Descartes

  11. #11
    Registered User dilbert719's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PC Load Letter View Post
    Over/Under on the week Jets fans start chanting for Tebow?
    Day 2 of the draft, at the latest.

  12. #12
    God's Way? Jesus tyke1doe's Avatar
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    No! No! No! No! No!
    "Biologists must constantly keep in mind that what they see was not designed but rather evolved." - Francis Crick.

    "For since the creation of the world, God's invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse." - Romans 1:20

    "It's one reason I hate reading what Tyke writes. It just annoys the hell out of me." - Big Pink Monkey

  13. #13
    Until further notice KickSave's Avatar
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    My favorite:

    MIAMI DOLPHINS Deal falls through when General Manager Jeff Ireland has second thoughts about whether Tebow would be embraced by fans in Florida.
    And this

    WASHINGTON REDSKINS The best thing about having already traded away your next three No. 1 picks and incurred severe salary cap penalties is that it becomes almost impossible to do anything else impetuous and foolish.
    Last edited by KickSave; 03-21-2012 at 05:19 PM.

  14. #14
    God's Way? Jesus tyke1doe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KickSave View Post
    My favorite:
    Ireland is an idiot. But at least he doesn't have to ask whether Tebow's mom is a prostitute.
    "Biologists must constantly keep in mind that what they see was not designed but rather evolved." - Francis Crick.

    "For since the creation of the world, God's invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse." - Romans 1:20

    "It's one reason I hate reading what Tyke writes. It just annoys the hell out of me." - Big Pink Monkey

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